Thursday, May 28, 2009

Dreaming about togetherness
i sit and i remember
there was a pleasant time
when you and i were together
you helped me be myself,
you taught me to be good.
i won the losing battle
that i was fighting against myself
your patience got me out of my shell
i learned to have fun
i learned that i love you
and that you love me too
our conversations were effortless,
words were unnecessary
silence was our friend
we needed only each other

then i started searching
beyond you and me
thats when we grew apart
but you still loved me
i made you wait much too long
you moved onto better things
realizing my mistake,
i came crawling back to you.
you forgave my idiocy
but made it very clear
that now there was obviously
a growing space between us.
we'd never go back to what we were
at least not for a while.
i told you that i love you
you said you loved me too
but just like you loved your friends,
and that there was nothing more to it.
i said i understood
that you were right this time
i pretended to accept your decision
but deep inside i cried
each time i heard your voice,
a million times i died.
Screaming at the emptiness
silences the shadows,
replays the memories
but replaces the pain.
noises,darkness,eternity,sunlight?
thoughts are confused,
sanity sees no reason
to exist henceforth
in harmony with me.

Chasing time,
racing memories,
escaping possibilities
and erasing all evidence
that you were once here
that your voice was my strength
that my pain was your enemy
whom we battled against
together, hand in hand.

Consumed by the bitterness
the past throws at me,
struggling, trashing in desperation,
to stay alive long enough
to watch you return,
to see that smile
for all of forever.
but for now i shall live,
hidden in the shadows of time.
Somewhere, a declaration of eternal mourning
Is emphasized by timeless tears,
Insolent drops of burning heartache.

Surreal screams of deep despair
Echo into the seamless skies,
Into calm nights of acceptance.

Twisted bitterness takes a turn
At resonating memories,
At dreaming of subtle glee

And then with a final twinge of pain
Tears, dreams and screams fade away
Into eventual unavoidable silence.
All this time,i didn't know it was true
that you were made for me,
and I've always been yours.
Those lengthy conversations,
the jealousy,the possessiveness
were signs of our destiny,
of what we live for.
Comatose subconscious's always knew,
that i was made specially,
only for you.
We're seperated only by miles,
in our hearts,we're still together.
You're in my dreams each night,
it's where you reside,
your rightful place.
I want you here with me,
as a physical reassurance.
You might never know i love you,
that you're all that i live for.
You're my destiny,
i've always loved you.
How do I tell you what you are to me;
how I feel about you
and myself when I'm with you

I've tried somehow to say;
you're the sun that lights up my sky;
that warms up my face
the winds that embrace
the calmness the ocean sound brings
the beauty of the birds that sings
you filled my world with the beauty of the spring

I want so much to tell;
my days seems incomplete without your presence
since day one I've always wanted to be with you
no matter what mood I'm in
you create reasons to put a smile on my face
and that loving you seems to be all I need to know.
I want to tell how much I care
how much I <3

But everytime I want to
the words just wont come out

yet I wish to tell
that I'm falling for you even more
with each passing millisecond.
No matter, wherever I go or whatever I do
I'll spend the rest of my life
Showing how much I care, how much I love you.
 

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